Ladubban Daren Farko Ga Ma’aurata
MATASA DA YAN MATAN WANNAN ZAMANIN SAI MU GYARA GASKIYA
Da ango ya shigo dakin sabuwar amaryarsa, bayan ya zauna, sai ya yi mata sallama cikakkiya, watau: ‘Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,’
Ita ma sai ta amsa da irin haka, watau: ‘wa alaikumus salamu wa rahmatullahi wabarakatuh.’
Ya fi kyau ya hada da mika mata hannu su yi musabaha tare da sallamar.
Sannan sai ya aza hannunsa na dama bisa saman goshin amaryarsa ya karanta wannan addu’ar:
‘Allahumma Inniy as’aluka khayraha wa khayra ma jabaltaha alayhi, wa a’uzu bika min sharriha wa sharri ma jabaltaha alayhi.’
Ita ma Amarya sai ta dora hannunta saman goshin angonta ta karanta kamar haka:
‘Allahumma inniy as’aluka khayrahu wa khayra ma jabaltahu alayhi, wa a’uzu bika min sharrihi wa sharri ma jabaltahu alayh.’
To daga nan sai su yo alwalla su yi sallar nafila raka’a biyu tare (watau cikin jam’i, ba daban-daban ba),
In sun idar sai su yi kyawawan addu’o’in duk da ya kamata, su roki Allah Ya sa alheri cikin rayuwar aurensu; Ya ba su zuriya dayyaba; ya ba su tsananin hakurin zama da juna, ya sa su kasance tare har Aljanna, da sauran bukatocin da suke fatan samu cikin rayuwar aurensu.
To bayan nan, ana so su dan tattauna tsakaninsu, kuma tattaunawa ta gaskiya tsagwaro ba tare da wani boye-boye
ba, tun da dai an riga an zama daya.
Ango ya gaya wa amaryarsa dukkan irin abin da yake so da wadanda ba ya so,misali ya ce: ‘Kin ga dai ni mutum ne da ba ya son raini, don haka ki yi kokarin kiyaye dokokina matukar ba su saba wa dokar addininmu ba, sannan kuma ba na son yawan fita ba tare da kwakkwaran dalili ba.
A fannin abinci ni mai son tuwo miyar kuka ne, ina kuma son fura da nono kindirmo,’ da dai sauran bayanai makamantan wadannan.
Haka ita ma amarya sai ta bayyana wa angonta dukkan abin da take so da wadanda ba ta so, kuma su duka su yi niyya mai karfi ta kiyaye hakkin juna, don samun zamantakewa mai kyau, mai dadi, wacce za ta iya fuskantar kowane yanayi na rayuwa ba tare da ginshikinta ya girgiza ba ballantana har ya tuge.
Daga nan sai su karanta wani littafi na addini da ya yi magana a kan fikihun aure, don su kara sanin hakkoki da irin nauyin da ya rataya a wuyan kowanensu. Ko kuma su samu wani faifai na wa’azin malamai a kan aure, su kalla ko ji tare suna masu tattauna abubuwan karuwa da suka ji a ciki.
Daga nan sai a yi shirin kwanciya barci. Yana da kyau sababbin ma’aurata su san cewa, ba lallai ba ne sai sun gabatar da ibadar aure a ranar.
Suna iya yin ’yan wasanni kadan-kadan na nuna so da kauna, kuma inda za su maimaita hakan akalla sau 7, ya zamar masu kamar wani dan kwas ne na fahimtar yanayin sha’awar juna, da kuma gane yanayin jikin juna da kuma gano malatsar sha’awar juna; in har za su iya wannan jinkirin, zai kara dandano, zimma da lazzar kayatarwar cikin ibadarsu; haka kuma sai ta kara samun cika da fa’ida; domin in aka yi haka da wuya a samu matsala.
In ma an lura da matsala ana iya magance ta a wannan lokacin jinkirin.
Lokacin gabatarwar ibadar aure, ango sai ya daure ya bi a hankali da amaryarsa, domin zuciyar kowace sabuwar amarya cike take da tsoro da fargabar abin da ke shirin faruwa da ita,
kuma akwai yiwuwar ta ji tsananin zafi, don haka in ango ya bi ta a hankali, zai iya rage mata wannan zafin da rudin da take ciki.
Kasawar sabon ango ran daren farko ba abin fargaba ba ne,don shi ma yana cikin fargaba da tsananin dokin yin wani abu a karo na farko wanda wannan na iya zauzautar da abubuwa gare shi, don haka sai ma’aurata su sa hakuri su kara gwadawa, su yi ta gwadawa har sai ango ya lakanci abin sosai ya iya rike kansa har sai lokaci mafi dacewa.
Kuma kada amarya ta yi wa angonta dariya dalilin wannan; ko ta ce dama bai isa auren ba aka yi masa, ko ta ji haushin sa, sai dai ta kasance masoyiya kuma uwargida ta kwarai wacce ke tallafawa mijinta a kowane lokaci.
Ango, sai ya yi hakuri da rashin tabuka komai daga amaryarsa, kada ya ji haushin ta ko ya fara tunanin bai auri irin matar da yake so ba; mata suna da tsananin kunya ta bangaren bayyana jin lazzar sha’awarsu, abin har ga matan da suka dade da aure, balle kuma sabuwar amarya?
Amma in ya yi niyya, kuma in har yana so, cikin dubaru da fasaha da yawan yabo, a hankali sai ya bice kunyar nan daga gare ta har ta rika yin irin yadda yake so.
Amarya kuma ta sani: in ta daure, ta kanne, ta cije, ta fara cire kunya tun ran daren farko ya fi alheri a gare ta da dorewar farin ciki a rayuwar aurenta.
Kafin gabatarwar ibadar aure, yana da kyau ga sababbin ma’aurata su san dukkan ladubban ibadar aure; kuma su tanadi dukkan abin da ya kamata su tanada.
Da fatan Allah Ya sa mu kasance cikin kulawar Sa a koda yaushe, amin
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